Early this afternoon, Arnold Schwarzenegger (R-CA) made a trip to the emergency room, where he was diagnosed with Ocular Dentata.
Ocular Dentata is a very rare condition in which the eyelids grow tiny teeth that gnash together when the patient blinks. In later stages, the eyes become "hungry," and the patient suffers cravings for objects to be consumed through the eyes. It is often thought that Eric Carmen, John DeNicola and Franke Previte--the singer and the writers of the song "Hungry Eyes," respectively--suffered from this condition, but there is no proof.
Ocular Dentata, though inconvenient, is treatable with steroid ointments and a great deal of patience and self-control.
Coincidentally, Governor Schwarzenegger's wife, Maria Shriver, suffered from a similar condition in her youth: Nasal Dentata. That ailment is far easier to treat (constant nose-picking does the trick), but like Ocular Dentata, it is highly contagious and often recurring.
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