Psychiatrists and scientists at the University of California at Berkeley have discovered a cure for depression--horse pee! This remarkable cure was found by accident, as several of the test subjects in an unrelated depression medication study felt so sad, mild, and grey that they tried to inject passion back into their lives by disgusting themselves through drinking horse pee.
Miraculously, the horse pee did not disgust them: It cured them. The researchers quickly set up a double-blind study, and the horse pee had a 99% success rate at curing depression.
The horse pee, however, cannot be bottled and sold in pharmacies. It must come right from the source--the horse, of course. The ideal regimen is five liters of horse pee a day for the rest of one's life. "It doesn't really taste that bad," said one newly cheered depressio. "It's certainly better than creamed spinach, I'll tell you that much." He smiled and took a sip from the horse pee cleverly kept in his 45 ounce nalgene.