Thursday, October 13, 2016

Honey Boo Boo Rapes Donald Trump

Reality TV star Honey Boo Boo was found guilty today on six counts of rape, over the incident in July in which she kidnapped, raped, and sounded Republican Presidential Nominee, Donald Trump.

Honey Boo Boo was tried as a juvenile, since she is 11, and will do community service as her sentence.

"I just wanted to go on a date with him," she said at a press conference in front of the New York State Southern District Courthouse this afternoon. "He said no, because I was too old and not hot enough. He said no over and over again. Why should I take no for an answer? A man like that? I had to have him. I did what I did because I had to do it, and honestly, I'm not sorry."

Mr. Trump suffered anal fissures, urethral bleeding, and a sad mood for a few weeks, but he'll be okay.


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